Night Weaning

      I decided to night wean Flintstone when he hit 18 months.  While I love nursing him and see nothing wrong with night nursing well past 18 months, this seems like the right time for us.  Flintstone has woken up to nurse at midnight and 4am every night like clockwork for the last year or more.  Before that, it was even more often, and before he was born, I had to get up at least twice a night to pee from the 4th month of pregnancy on.  So I haven't slept more than 4 hours at a stretch in over 2 years.

     The whole process was less painful than I thought.  We did two nights a couple weeks ago, but he got a cold, so I waited a week or so for him to feel better.  Even though he wasn't very sick, I didn't want to aggrevate whatever bug he was fighting with the stress of weaning.  Plus, I wanted to cuddle my  bug back to health.  After about a week, we tried again.  The first night he was pretty fretful, but never for more than a few minutes at a time.  Every night from then on was less and less an issue.

      It's been about a week, and last night when I laid down with him, he whined just a little, but quieted down really quickly for his story, then laid calmly for a few minutes and promptly fell asleep.  Then he didn't wake up again until after 5 this morning!  I'm so happy for my little man.  I think he'll sleep better, too once he really gets the hang of this new arrangement.

      For anyone who's interested, here are a few more details on the progression of our sleep/nursing arrangement from the beginning:

      For the first few nights after he was born, Flintstone slept in a crib pushed up against and basically level with our bed.  We slept straight through the night not long after he was born, but only one time.  Usually, he wanted to eat every two hours.  And it didn't take me long to figure out how much easier it was if he just slept in the bed with us.  I did a bunch of research and determined this arragement to be not only safe, but very beneficial to both of us, and from that point on, Flinstone slept in the bed with us and nursed on and off throughout the night.

      Once we established a bedtime routine (dinner, maybe bath, change clothes, brush teeth, three stories), I would nurse Flintstone to sleep, then put him down in his crib next to the bed where he would sleep until midnight.  On his first waking, I would bring him into bed with us.

      As he started getting bigger, though, he started to become a bit of a wild sleeper.  His favorite position was "H is for Hell:"

      To be more specific, he would usually start out doing "Snow Angels," and gradually make the progression to "H is for Hell,"  all the while with his face close, if not connected to, my chest, and his feet seeking MacGyver out.  And Flintstone 'kneeds' his feet in his sleep - just like me.  My feet are rarely ever still, even when I'm sleeping, I rub them together, or I rub them against anything they come in contact with - like MacGyver's feet or a pillow shoved down there to keep my feet away from MacGyver's feet ;-).  Unfortunately for MacGyver, the kneeding feet are quite a bit more distracting when they are jammed into your chest, belly, neck, or face.

      Flintstone was also a fan of "The Stalker."  Which I always thought was SUPER cute, because he would break into the biggest grin the second you opened your eyes.

      Anyway, even in our massive king sized bed, somehow we always ended up in "H is for Hell," with Flintstone's feet treating MacGyver like wayward bread dough.  Actually, we discovered that when we were out and about, or on a trip or something, MacGyver could easily help put Flintstone to sleep by holding onto his feet, or letting Flintstone put his feet up against MacGyver.  It was kind of cute.  And kind of wierd since it only worked with MacGvyer.

       But the feet wars oovernight got old fast, and we decided to move Flintstone to a mattress on the floor in our room when he was round a year old (I think - I honestly don't remember what age it was).  I would lay with him, nurse him to sleep in his bed, then go about my night.  I would go to bed with MacGyver, and when Flintstone woke up, I would go lay with him and nurse him back to sleep.  About 50% of the time, I'd fall asleep too and spend most of the night, or the whole rest of the night, in Flintstone's bed.

      The night weaning is the beginning of a slow process to move Flintstone into his own room.  First, we'll complete the weaning, as we have been.  The bedtime routine has only been modified a little in that now, after he's changed into his pajamas, I nurse him fully before brushing his teeth and laying down with him to read a story.  He doesn't get to nurse during the story anymore.  I still lay with him until he falls asleep though.  And throughout the night, if he wakes up, I go lay with him and cuddle him until he falls asleep. 

      Once he's fully night weaned and sleeping through the night without waking up; I'll slowly transition away from laying with him to sitting with him.  Once he's fully accustomed to that, we'll start doing the routine in his room.

       I realize I've made it sound like MacGyver has nothing to do with this, but we've made all these plans together, and at least one night a week, MacGvyer executes the bedtime routine, always starting with a bath because Flintstone loves to take a bath with MacGyver.

      And that, folks, is our current baby sleep plan.

       Did you read yet about what happened with my coffee this morning?  Check out my last post if you missed it.

Framed Words

Jumping in again with Impulsive Addict and Seriously Shawn For Talk To Us Tuesday because it has NO RULES!  And that's about the only thing I can committ to these days.

 

     Man, oh man, what a week!  And it's only Tuesday!  The other lawyer is out of the office for the whole week, and I was already behind at the beginning of the week, so things have been crazy to say the least.  And I'm drowning myself in teas and herbal remedies trying to fight off this sneaky little cold since being sick just isn't an option this week.  Yesterday I tried to run it out of myself, which seemed to help so we'll see.

      MacGyver's been super busy, too.  Contemplating a new career and juggling a million balls in the air.  I have no idea how that man does it.  He's also working on and heading up committees for the church left and right, and battling the insurance company, and performing routine vehicle maintnance because heaven knows I'm not about to do it.  He lead the most beautiful Ostara ritual on Sunday.  I can't wait to upload the pictures, if our friend who took them ever sends them to me.

      And even in the midst of all the swirling chaos of our lives, it's still important for us to find time for each other, to remind each other that we're still in this together and that we're still completely in love.  I've mentioned before that we have a journal that we've passed back and forth to record our feelings to each other since way back when we were in a long distance relationship.  Well, needless to say, neither of us has a whole lot of time for epic romance sonnets these days.  So we also have this:

      It's just a sheet of (recycled) notebook paper in a cheap frame.  We keep it in our master bathroom and use it to write little love notes back and forth to each other nearly every day.  You can also fancy it up with scrapbook paper, but I went the tree saving root with a little less dye.  You can also just write on the mirror in dry erase marker, but I always feel guilty erasing MacGyver's beautiful words when I need to do my hair.

      What little gestures to you share with your loved ones?

     Finally, on a totally unrelated note:

Happy Ostara/Equinox!

Won't you balance some eggs with us?

Weekend, Weekend, Weekend, Fight!

**OK, so it's no longer Tuesday.  I started writing this post yesterday, but then my stupid computer crashed.  Erg.  Just pretend it's still Tuesday.  Heaven knows I could use the extra day...

 


      Look at all the blogging I'm doing this week!  I know it looks like a lot, but it's an illusion.  Half of it has been done on my phone, and the rest of it is barely entertaining ;-)  Today, though I'm jumping in again with  Impulsive Addict and Seriously Shawn For Talk To Us Tuesday because it has NO RULES!  And that's about the only thing I can committ to these days.

      Back when I thought I was really busy but still managed to find time to blog just about every day, I really enjoyed recounting all the fun we had on the weekends.  I like to have a record of the good times our family has and the activities we do.  For instance, I thought I had written a post about how we went geocaching a few weeks ago, but now it looks like I didn't.  That's a little sad because it was a really fun weekend.

      I don't even remember what we did the morning before we went geo-caching, but I do remember that it was just an all around great day.  Our area has a lot of geo-caches (think gps guided outdoor treasure hunt).  That day, we went to a local state part that we love and chased down one cache, spent some time on the beach, then went after another.

This child LOVES nature and being outdoors more than anything.

Mama, what are these?!?

No, I will not put them down.  They are my new friends.  I am keeping them.

Punky and Flintstone exploring.  Is this not one of the most gorgeous parks you've ever seen?  The whole place is amazing.

Since we did this on Super Bowl Sunday, the beach was absolutely deserted.



My kids refuse to smile in pictures with me.  It's because I'm an aweful troll of a mom who tries to make them stand still for 10 seconds for a picture.



This sad excuse for a picture is the only one I have of finding the geo-cache, which Punky is pointing at.

       We love geo-cacheing.  It is a great way to be out in nature, explore, and get some low-key exercise.  We haven't been out again since that weekend, but that's because all our weekends since have been filled with all sorts of other fun!

      A couple weeks ago, we put in a third garden.  We have our first, small garden near our patio (of which I don't believe I have any pictures).  That one didn't get enough light for most things, but grows some beautiful herbs and is also home to some stubborn brussels sprouts which refuse to grow properly.  The second garden is our big garden out in our side yard near the road.  Any pictures from past posts that mention the garden would be of that garden.  Right now, it looks very baren with just little seedlings here and there.  In the spirit of that, MacGyver took one string of solar LED christmas lights and threw them haphazardly over the branches of the palm tree in the middle of the garden.  So now it looks super redneck, which is rather fitting for us.

       The third garden takes up a large corner of our backyard and is devoted mainly to greens: spinach, kale, collards, broccoli, and a couple other things I can't remember now.  We also planted some seedlings that grew out of the squash seeds on the top of our compost heap along the fence.

Digging like Daddy

Look!  I can shovel, too!

      While MacGyver was busy digging, mixing, and mounding, and while Punky was running back and forth between her swing and the neighbors', Flintstone and I started some seeds:

This is my kind of housework, Mama

      This last weekend was no exception to the joy and fun of previous weekends.  Friday night, we volunteered overnight for Family Promise, a volunteer organization that helps homeless families acheive sustainable independance.  We stayed with two families, including two little boys Punky's age and one Flintstone's age, so there was much playing going on!  Some people think of working with the homeless as a sad experience, but I don't see it that way.

       Part of that is because Family Promise isn't just a place for homeless individuals to sleep and get some food; it provides further services to actually get them on their feet.  While I am completely in support of any kind of homeless shelter, there are some of them that can be shrouded in a feeling of hopelessness.  Family Promise shelters - in my experience - do not have that problem.  Which is why we're comfortable taking the kids there.

      I love any opportunity to get my kids involved in volunteering and service, and this was an excellent opportunity.  The parents in the program were wonderful company, and after fulfilling the responsibilities of volunteers, we spent a pleasent evening chatting about all sorts of things while the kids played.

      Another thing I enjoyed was that there was no awkwardness.  I have been in volunteering situations with people who were facing rough times when I either didn't want to admit that I was a lawyer because people assume that means I am wealthy or where I did say I was a lawyer and the individuals I was working with started treating me differently.  Nothing like that happened Friday night.  We were all just people.  It was lovely, and we're looking forward to volunteering again some time.

      We kicked off Saturday with a trip to the Farmer's Market followed by a lovely day at home.  Flintstone and I cleaned the kitchen while MacGyver built a new bench with shoe storage cubbies for our entryway.  Thank heavens, because our entryway had become a center of disorganization and random odds and ends clutter in our house.  It looks a lot nicer now.  And the clutter has relocated across the room to the next nearest flat surface ;-)

      We went to a couple of local nurseries and got some new plants for the garden.  We perfer to start them from seeds but MacGyver we only have so much time for seeding and transplanting.  One day.  One day our whole garden will be from our own seeds (and kitchen scraps!).

      Saturday night, we went to our favorite little local coffee house for some Fair Trade soy lattees and a walk along the waterfront at dusk.  The weather was perfect; the water was gorgeous; it was just beautiful.  We played with the kids on the playground for a good 45 minutes: laughing and running around, climbing, and sliding.  We had a blast.  We wondered back toward the coffee house and took a short break to roll around on the grass under the stars since night had fallen by this point.  Eventually, we made it back to the car and headed home.  Flinstone was out in about 4 seconds.

      At home, we watched an episode of Numb3rs, our new favorite show on Netflix.  I actually have a whole post about the show, but it went off on a wild tangent and needs to be edited...  You know, so it's nice and consice like this post...

      After we tucked Punky in, we cracked open a bottle of wine and spent a little quality time together.  We did NOT take the time change into account.

      Sunday morning, I spent my usual hour playing alone with Flintstone while everyone else was asleep.  Well, half the time I was playing with him.  The other half he was entertaining himself, and I was reading The Other Boleyn Girl, which started out a little slow, but I'm very much enjoying now.

      The church service was wonderful as always, and afterward we had some discussions about the upcoming Ostara ritual.  (Is it that time already?!?!).  The rest of the day was grocery shopping, gardening, chilling, cooking, and eating.

      And then we were back to the grind.

       Thus ends a very long and thrilling weekend recap for Cheap Wine and Cookies Land.  But since I'm eating up my time with a super long post anyway, there are a couple other things I want to mention:

       I kicked @$$ in groundfighting yesterday.  About 2 weeks ago a new Marine Corps Martial Arts Progrpam (MCMAP) class started up that I am actually able to attend since it's not at a ridiculous time.  I love MCMAP, and don't get to do it nearly as often as I'd like.  I really want to finish up my black belt before I get out of the Marine Corps, but I don't know if that will be possible.  Right now I'm working on my Green belt, which I want to get by the beginning of May.  After that, I'll have to take a break for my surgery.  After the Green belt is Brown and then Black.  It's a LOT of hours to try to fit in in the next year or so, but it makes me really happy.

       Yesterday was the first day we've done groundfighting in this class.  I was pitted against another female who was a little shorter but also a little stockier than I am.  She was definitely favored to win.  I'm not surprised.  I am not a person who would ever jump to fight, and in practice, I tend to worry way too much about accidentally hurting my partner.  And I'm small.  I'm 5'5" tall and 116lbs.  But I am desceptively strong, very flexible, and I don't like to lose.

       I had my opponant's face on the mat from the start and for pretty much the whole thing.  AND it was an amazing workout.  I love groundfighting.

       That said, I'm not getting too cocky, because everyone else in the class is a lot bigger than me, so future opponants will be a lot more challenging.

      Last night we had a meeting for one of the Committees from our church at our house.  For as busy as we are, MacGyver and I can't seem to avoid getting sucked into more and more activities with the church!  The Pagan group, the Buddhist group, the Young Adults group, and now MacGyver has joined the Communications Committee which governs all things technological, networking, and related to communications.  It is a fairly new committee since our little church is undergoing a massive growth surge.  Websites need to be designed, with all the widgets and gadgets necessary to keep a congregations of social and environmental justice-minded activist individuals aware of what's going on.

       I'm not on that committee.  It's MacGyver's thing and I DO NOT have time (I keep insistantly telling myself).  So I was doing dishes, cooking, and doing laundry, wandering around the house while they were meeting.  While cooking, I was listening to MacGvyer talk about social justice issues and community organization, referencing actions of the UUA (the nationwide head of UUism), and I had to smile.

        When we first met, MacGyver and I butted heads a little bit about religion.  While MacGyver no longer practiced, he had been raised Catholic and was stuck in an internal conflict between his unsteady Christian beliefs and his issues with some of the practices of the Catholic church.  He wasn't thrilled about my Paganism because he had aparently known some "wiccans" when he was younger who left a bad taste in his mouth about the whole thing; and UUism didn't even sound like a religion to him because it lacked the rules and dogma to which he was accustomed.

      Well, now, 8 years after having first met, we've both changed a lot.  We are too extreme personalities pulling each other to the center.  He teaches me to question, and I teach him to trust.  And last night, listening to him speak, a fervent voice of Unitarian Universalism, I had to smile at how far we've come together.

      Maybe one of these days I'll do a post on the consept of shared intelligence...

I call this "Off to the Ministry of Magic."
We're still potty training at a completely un-rushed rate.  Whenever possible, which is often only on the weekends, Flintstone runs around diaper free.  And while he rarely actually uses the potty (for it's intended purpose, at least), it has been a long time since we've had any puddles on the floor.  Progress.  And now when he needs his diaper changed, in addition to signing "change," he also points at his diaper and insists, "Pee-pee!" 

Truely my child:  We had a huge thunderstorm, and I couldn't pull him away from watching the rain in the garden.  I had to serve him his veggie pancakes and tea in front of the open slider.  And, yes, we give him tea.  Mostly nettle and camomile, occasionally with just a touch of green tea.  He loves it.  And he asks for tea by name.

High Hopes, Big Ideas, and Plugging Along

      I have time to post today, right now.  Not a lot of time, but time.  I figure I had better put something up because this week is shaping up to be a busy one. 

      I got a ton done today.  In the first hour I was at work this morning, I closed 4 cases.  I scheduled a bunch of conferences and whatnot over the course of the next couple days, and, if I can stick to my schedule, I will close 7 more cases by Friday.

       This is big.  Too many open cases at once is extremely stressful.  And, after last week's craziness, I had a LOT of open cases.  It feels good to get resolution for my clients.  And it feels even better to get the stacks of chaos off my desk.

      Though I do now have a pile of chaos on the floor next to my desk.  I figure if it's there, in my way, looking atrocious, maybe I'll be more likely to sort through it and file it away.

      Right.

       If that were the case, my entryway table wouldn't be COVERED in debris from the last 3 months.  (And 3 months is being generous - it probably goes back to the day we moved in).

      Nevertheless, my desk is cleared off, I've closed a bunch of cases today (I closed even more this afternoon).  If all goes well, I will only have 3 open cases remaining at the end of this week.  That's assuming I don't open any more this week.  Which, of course, I will.  But getting down to 3 cases is the goal.

      I have a lot of balls in the air right now.

      Ha.

      I said I have a lot of balls.

      *Oops*  My closet Jr. High sense of humor got out there for a minute.

      I have a lot on my mind.  Seriously, there is so much floating around in there, I'm surprised strings of words in Times New Roman font haven't stared falling out of my ears.

       I have big plans at work.  I'm revamping systems that have been in place for years.  I'm modernizing.  I'm saving some trees.  I'm leaving my mark.

      You know, between the back-to-back-to-back clients. 

       I have big plans, but putting them into action is slow going.

        The same goes for at home.  Big plans.  Big plans for stuff to do with the kids.  Big plans for the gardens.  Big plans for cleaning/organizing/redecorating.  Big plans for date nights with MacGyver.

       Time to put those plans into action, though?  Limited.

       At the very least, I have made a couple calls about getting a babysitter.

       Thank heavens for MacGyver.  Even though he has been crazy busy the last couple weeks, too, he has really taken on a lot around the house.  My main two chores every night are cooking dinner and doing the dishes - which may not sound like a lot to you stay-at-home or work-at-home types, but I only have about 3 hours a night with my kids and my "chores" don't include any of the things I have to/ get to do with them (homework, playing, baths, bedtime, etc.).  Over the last week or so, MacGyver has taken over cooking a couple times, and done the dishes for me at least twice.  He is the sweetest thing.  Seriously, I have never met a more considerate person.

      I just wish I were better equipped to return the favor.  Which of his chores can I do for him???  It would have to be a heck of a lot of them to even compare to what he does for me.

      But I have big plans for things to do at home.  MacGyver and I were hatching even bigger plans today at lunch.  Ahhhh, future fantasies.

      Then there's this little blog here.

       So many posts swirling around in my brain.  Ethical Eating and Sustainable Living!  We've been doing so much around the house that I want to share!  There is so much information I want to diseminate!  But cobbling together those posts takes a lot more effort than long train of thought rambles like this.  And the Compassion blog (which I secretly think no one else really likes, but whatever, it's important to me).  I'm already in Step 2, and there is so much to write about for Step 2, but I still haven't finished writing my Step 1 posts.  Erg.

       And Project 52?  Yeah, well, we just won't talk about that.

       Dangit.  This was not supposed to be another post whining about how I'm so busy lately.  It was supposed to motivate me to write the other posts I've been putting off.

      Fail.

      Oh well.  You'll deal.  At least it's not another Compassion post, right?  (NO!  Not right, you love the Compassion posts, don't you?)

      I AM busy lately, but it's good busy.  It's getting things done busy.  It's responsible adult busy.

       Which leaves me wondering:

       How the EFF do real, no-kidding responsible adults do this?  How the EF do you live in a house with two working parents and do quality work and lead a healthy lifestyle and maintain an entertaining blog/hobby and keep up on the latest professional and interest-based information and keep a clean house and keep in touch with friends and have a social life and lead church groups and cook and clean (yes, it's redundant, but so is effing cleaning) and date your husband and grow personally and BREATHE?

        Seriously.  I don't think it's possible.  I'm starting to think everyone else is faking it.  Or you're keeping house elves around to do your cleaning.  And maybe your gardening.

       Don't get me wrong, I am having a really good week.  I'm happy.  Things are awesome.  I'm kicking ass.  But even when I'm on top of my game and kicking ass,  there are things falling to the wayside.  I was supposed to reshuffle my savings account setup today, and I didn't even glance at it.  I didn't write a good blog post.  I didn't take the diapers out of the drier.  I am SO far behind in garden prep.

       This post has no point.  But I really wanted to post in case I don't get the chance over the next couple days. 

      And because none of you like my Compassion posts.

      Not that I'm whining.  Because I'm not.

      I am happy and super greatful for all the amazing things life has piled on me to stress me out: Family, Job, Faith, Interests, the whole chaotic mess!




Flintstone decided he wanted to learn to use chopsticks last night.  Pretty darned good for 16 months old!


       And there are about 4 of you who I owe return emails to.  Brittany is one of them.  There are more.  Did I say I was going to send you some information then fail to do so.  PLEASE call me out on it.  I really need to start flagging the emails I need to respond to.

      More random.

      Good thing the lovely Shawn and IA don't have any rules for their Talk to Us Tuesday!  And for more of my rambling, check out IA's hilarious post for TTUT Today and my mini blog post in her comments section.     




 I don't even know if that's the right code because my stupid computer blocks everything.It even, as of last week, block Pinterest.The horror!

Chill Weekend

      We had a great weekend.  Nothing too particularly exciting, but still pretty enjoyable.  I had a girls' night out with some girlfriends Friday night that was SO much fun even though we didn't stay out very late.  At home, we watched a few movies, and I spent most of the day Saturday just getting tons of stuff done.  It was normal stuff, tidying up, cleaning the floors, laundry, errands, that sort of thing, but it was nice to have time to just get it all out of the way.

      Having Boo around has been a really big help and the house is very, very clean, which I love.  Too bad that won't last after we leave him back in MI :-(.

      Sunday was all sleeping in and board games and relaxing.  Not an exciting weekend, but a relaxing one.  Of course, MacGyver and I had to go and run a freaking azload of sprints at 0600 this morning so I'm exhausted now.  So much for having relaxed ;-). 

Better To Say Nothing

I could post one of the 654 half-written posts that are lingering on my desktop.  I could post a few more Flintstone milestones/updates (like how he's now 100% over his hatred of the car seat).  I could relates ome humorous observations from my conversation with NotDonna last night or some of the silliness that has taken place at work today.

I could produce a moderately worthwile post using any of those methods.  This is, I could if I could wrestle my mind out of the salacious gutter in which it has been lounging all day.

MacGyver has been out of town for 9 days.  Or is it 10 now?  Whatever, he's been gone a long freakin time.  He's on his way home as I write this.

And I can't wait until he gets home.

He will be tired and grumpy, dishevelled and in need of a shower.  He'll probably have a whole lot of beard growth going on. 

But I don't care.

I will refrain from details, but I will admit one thing:

I am having impure thoughts.

Not even thoughts.  I have been having an impure stream of consciousness all day.

I am SO ready for my husband to be home.

So forgive me for the lack of a post here.  Forgive me for lack of substance or for failing to post something fun and entertaining to make up for yesterday's rant.  But the inside of my head today resembles that of a pent up teenager.  And I'm trying to spare you.

But let's face it,

Nine days is too damn long.

I hope you all enjoy Father's Day and your weekend.  I know I sure as heck will.

9 Months and Old Habits

Yesterday was Flintstone's 9 month birthday.  9 Months.  (That said 9 Moths until I proofread it).  And man is he one adorable little piglet.

I could wax poetic about how time flies and how amazing it is to watch my baby grow and develop.  It has been amazing, and time does fly, but we all know that, and that post has been done to death by every blogger with a baby.  I will however, give a quick Flintstone update:
- He crawls - fast
- He stands with no trouble at all and can do things while he's standing.
- He tries to walk.  It doesn't typically work out for him, which is fine with me.
- He hates to be contained.
- His favorite food is celery, though given the choice, he'd rather eat paper any day.  (Seriously, I work so hard to feed him local, organic food and veggies from our garden, to use bio-friendly unchemically cleaning supplies and keep him away from harmful toxins and the kid shoves every wayward peice of bleached, dyed, printed on paper he can find in his mouth - and cries when I fish it out!)
- He says Dada all. the. time.  He makes other sounds, too, but mostly it's Dada.  I say "Mama," he grins and yells "Dada!"
- He does a few signs - milk, up, give me, and he's made up his own signal for "change me" even though he is on a desperate mission to escape the second the diaper comes off.  And he waves goodbye.
- He gives kisses (98% of the time he'll only do it for me), and it's freaking adorable.  Lethal adorable.
- He does the pincers grasp
- He loves owls.  We have an owl calendar in the kitchen.  ANY time I walk near it with him, he giggles hysterically.  One day I will catch it on video.  I can't even express how cute it is.  He lights up when he sees that calendar.

I'm sure there are a million things more, but that seems like a pretty decent catch up.

In other news, you may have noticed that the blogs are getting a little fewer and farther between.  That's not likely to change any time soon.  I'm busy, and, sadly, this isn't my highest priority.

MacGyver and Punky have been out of town for a week.  They went to put new cabinets in our house before handing it over to new renters.  MacGvyer figured it would take two days.  I knew better, but I didn't say anything.  When it comes to projects, MacGyver functions on what I call "man time."  I've also referred to it as "football minutes."  You know how the last 30 minutes of a football game acutally take, like 4 hours?  Yeah, those are football minutes.  But since MacGyver's not all that into sports, I've generalized it to Man Time.

Usually, when MacGyver leaves, my heart is instantly broken.  This time was so strange because I was feeding Flintstone when he left, so there was no nostalgic gazing after this receding tail lights.  I kissed him goodbye, but his absence didn't even sink in for an hour or so after he left.

And I kept so busy the first couple days that they were gone that it wasn't bad at all.  It was actually - dare I say it - kind of nice.  I got SO MUCH done.  I'm good at getting stuff done with Flintstone in tow, but not so much with MacGyver and Punky milling about. 

It was relaxing.  The house was so quiet.  I just did what I wanted, when I wanted.  I didn't have to cook any big meals.  Don't get me wrong, I love cooking for my family and I take great pride in the variety of very healthy meals I make (as evidenced by my FB and Twitter feeds).  But because of my dedication to serving healthy meals, most nights when MacGyver and Punky are home are completely eaten up by chopping, cooking, eating, and cleaning up after.  When it's just Flintstone and me,  I just eat leftovers or a big bowl of veggies and puree up some veggies for Flintstone.

The first couple days were lovely and relaxing.  But it has been a week now.  I'm done with being relaxed, and I've had enough getting stuff done.  It was a nice throwback to being single, and now I'm ready to be married and busy and harried again.  Man time can end any minute now.  I like talking to Flintstone and the chickens when I get home, but I'd rather talk to MacGyver (live and in person).  Not to mention other activities I'm really starting to miss . . .

In the mornings, though, I still don't miss them.  I don't usually interact with them much in the mornings anyway.  MacGyver wakes up shortly before I leave for work, and Punky shortly after.  So when they're home I spend the mornings sneaking around in the dimly lit house getting things ready and tending to the dogs.  With MacGyver and Punky out of town, it's been amazing how quickly I reverted back to my Law School routine. 

I get up a half an hour earlier than I need to and spend that time just sitting with a cup of tea and enjoying an episode of Bones or a documentary.  I can turn on lights (some lights, I still try not to wake Flintstone up till it's time to leave).  The mornings are really lovely this week.

And I can get up that extra half hour earlier because without Punky's bedtime and the alluded to activities, I get to bed a LOT earlier, even with 2 -3 hours of getting stuff done after I put Flintstone down for the night.

Some old habits never really go away, they just go into hibernation.

Even so.  I am SO ready for them to come home.  And SO ready to see pictures of the newly renovated kitchen!  Even though I may never get to use it.  Sigh . . .

Monday, Monday . . .

(Ok, so this song isn't fitting at all, but I can't get it out of my head today, and it's a hell of a lot better than that damned Bruno Mars song.  I swear I'm going to shoot someone if I have to hear that song one more effing time.  Good for him that he's rich, single, and childless enough to sit around all frigging day with his hand down his pants.  I don't need to hear about it in crappy song form 75 times a day.  *Ahem*)

It has been one of those mornings.  It’s like two Mondays in one.  Nothing in particular is wrong; it’s just Monday.  Sleep deprivation, probably.  No, not probably; definitely.

You see, we’re transitioning Flintstone to the crib.  Up until a few weeks ago we had been co-sleeping (technically the term is bed-sharing; co-sleeping includes the baby sleeping in a crib in the same room as the parents, but colloquially people seem to recognize co-sleeping as meaning bed-sharing).  I love co-sleeping.  It’s just so easy.  From the time we started when Flintstone was a week or two old I have rarely been sleep deprived.    We lay down to go to bed and he’s out.  If he gets hungry or needs comfort during the night, he just roots around and cuddles up to me and I rarely even have to wake up for it.

It really has been an ideal situation up until recently.  I had a bedrail (installed with all safety precautions attended to) on my side of the bed, and Flinstone would sleep between me and the bedrail because MacGyver was nervous about bumping or elbowing Flintstone in his sleep (even though when they have taken *adorable* naps together it’s never been an issue).  Plus it was nice not having a baby between us at night.  We have a king bed so I could just scoot over to the middle of the bed and it was almost more like a sidecar arrangement.  But eventually Flintstone became able to crawl/roll/squirm down toward the end of the bedrail and soon he was able to pull himself up on it.

Now I have never once slept through Flintstone waking up.  It is a scientifically proven fact that breastfeeding mothers who co-sleep (SOBER) are acutely aware of the movements and wakings of their babies.  I certainly was.  Nevertheless, it worried me to wake up and see Flintstone immediately me a b-line for the end of the bed or lean over the bedrail.

So we moved him into the middle.  After all, he’s a lot bigger now (almost 21lbs!!!), and it’s unlikely that MacGyver would be able to roll over onto him without instantly knowing it.  This worked for a little while until MacGyver accidentally “hit” Flintstone in his sleep.  Now, he didn’t hit him hard at all.  It didn’t even wake Flintstone up, but it was enough to freak MacGyver out.  And Flintstone still loves to take off for the end of the bed (which is where the bedrail is now) or try to climb over us.

So I moved him to his crib, which has been next to our bed all along.  He’s slept in it here and there for various reasons; he sleeps in it when we take trips (it’s a pack and play – his real crib is in his room which is not really hos room yet since he’s still in our room); and he naps in it, so he’s familiar with his crib.

(We wanted to make sure Flintstone thought of the crib as a happy place.  Here is MacGyver's take on how to do that.)

Still, he hasn’t been too into the idea of transitioning.  Why would he be?  Cozy mommy and an all night snack bar or just boring old sleep all by himself (though he’s well aware that I’m in the bed right next to him, which might be making matters worse).

He wakes up every hour.  Every. Single. Hour.  Sometimes, he’ll stay asleep for 2 or three hours when I first put him down, but of course I’m not in bed at that time anyway.  Once I’m in bed, though, it begins.  He doesn’t get mad or cry.  Well, he did the first couple nights, but he now knows that I’m still there, he’s just not in the bed.  But he still wakes up every hour and rustles and grunts and – on the off occasion that I haven’t acknowleged him after 3 or 4 minutes – yells at me.  Not cries, just yells.  His language for “Damnit Mommy!” since the only word he currently says is DaDa (though he does do a couple signs – milk, pick me up, give me).

So I drag my exhausted butt out of bed, pick him up, and nurse him for 6 seconds until he passes back out.  Overall, not a fun time.

And it’s my fault.  I KNOW this.  You don’t have to tell me.  I’ve spent 8 months letting him fall asleep in the boob.  He’s formed a very strong sleep association.  Lying down to nurse = bedtime.  Waking up in the night = time to nurse back to sleep.  And it was great while it lasted.  But now I’m paying for it.  Because he wakes up every hour.  And while a baby who wasn’t nursed back to sleep all the time might already be able to re-settle himself during brief night waking, Flintstone doesn’t yet know how.

But we’re working on it.

I got The No-Cry Sleep Solution since it was recommended by Dr. Sears – who’s advice I have always found trustworthy so far.  I’m only ½ - 2/3 of the way through the book, but so far I love it.  It makes absolute perfect sense and lays out a number of wonderful suggestions for gently using classical and operant conditioning to teach Flintstone to fall asleep on his own and resettle during brief night wakings.  (Note: the book doesn’t call it classical or operant conditioning – that’s the soc/psych/anthropologist in me talking).

I dutifully tracked all his wakings for three nights and MacGyver and the nanny have tracked all his naps.  Honestly, I didn’t find this tracking all that useful, but maybe I will in 10 days when I track again as comparision.

The first technique I’ve chosen to use is to break Flintstone’s association with falling asleep with a nipple in his mouth.  I nurse him until he’s almost asleep, then pull it out.  If he gets upset, I give it back.  The first night we tried it, this back and forth went on for 30 or so repetitions and lasted about 45 minutes.  It was painfully boring, but there was no crying, and in the end it worked.  In successive nights, it has taken fewer and fewer repetitions.  It’s looking good.

After he’s mastered falling asleep without a nipple, we’ll work on putting him in the crib still a little awake using basically the same technique.  After or concurrent with that, we’ll work on not picking him up to sooth him when he wakes up at night, instead trying “soothing words” (think classical conditioning), and patting/rubbing his back.

The only real problem I anticipate is his new night waking habit.  See, he still wants to eat – just a tiny snack – every time he wakes up (which is, as I may have mentioned, every hour).  And he’s figured out that I’m in the bed next to him and that I’ll pick him up and comfort him back to sleep (because if I don’t pick him up he does eventually start crying).  So now, when he wakes up, he rolls around and snuffles and grunts for a few seconds, then he stands up and peers sleepily at me over the railing.  This is a problem because he is obviously waking himself up more than need be if he’s standing up to wait for his snack.  So we’ll have to see how that one gets resolved.

Already, there have been a couple of times where he’s fussed just a little then fallen back to sleep in his own, so there is already progress and it’s only been about 3 nights.  But that progress doesn’t make it any less painful that I can count the number of times I’ve slept more than one hour at a time the last 3 weeks on one hand.  Last night, I almost fell asleep standing up holding him.  Scary.

But it’s worth it.  I cannot do the crying it out thing.  It hurts too much and research all points to it being very bad for his little brain.

We’re also working on getting a stronger bedtime routine set up for him, which is a major challenge considering there is precious little time every night, but we’re getting there.

So, today, I’m tired.  I’m running on tea and stress.  And it won’t be changing overnight.  But it is changing.  And it’s worth it to do it this way.

I just have to keep reminding myself of that when I get the urge to hurl my computer out the window or curl up under my desk and go to sleep.

Happy Monday All!  I’ll try to be a little better at posting this week.  Last week was N.U.T.S. at work.

My Office Smells Awesome!

This is just an update to the post before it, Bull-Headed Bulldozers and Cheesecake.  Pretty please read that one first since it's the real post.  This is just the pocket part.  Or, if you're not a law type, its a sidecar. 

MacGyver and I had lunch together at a little place near my work.  His idea.  He called me when he was close, and I walked over to meet him, but then it took 10 minutes forever for him to show up.  No biggie.  He said he was stuck behind a big truck that appeared to be lost.  Not unusual on this base.  So we had a pleasant lunch, and I came back to my office. 

Turns out HE LIED about the reason he was delayed getting to lunch.  My office smells so pretty right now thanks to the three beautiful boquets he snuck in.  He really is just the coolest husband ever.

He also brought in my new RC tank that shoots plastic BBs.  Which drastically decreased the productivity of a few of my co-workers and one of my bosses for a little while. 

As Mama's Thyme would say, "I got the spoileds." :-D

And that only covers up to lunch time . . .

PS:  Man, you all have written some AWESOME posts today.  I am going to do my best to shoot some well deserved comments your way tonight, because, wow.  It's been a fruitful day in the blogsphere!

Bull-Headed Bulldozers and Cheesecake

(The picture of us was taken not too long after the establishment of the miniversary.)

My life is like a sine wave.  When nothing is going on then, seriously nothing is happening beyond the everyday rumble of chaos that is always in the background.  But the second one thing breaks loose – good or bad – everything flies off the handle.  The last trimester or so of my pregnancy was pretty low key, as were the first couple/few months of Flintstones life.  Then we went into an upswing.  You may have noticed that I've been rather busy lately.  Work, family time, insurance claims, massive renovations, and administrative bedlam abound.  As always, I am embracing the disarray with confident knowledge that this too shall pass and before I know it, we will be in a whole new phase of excitement.  Things are FAR from bad, but they certainly are crazy hectic. 

Last week, though, was hard.  I have been wearing thin.  MacGyver is having some health problems and the Docs aren't providing any answers, so I have been worried about him and trying to get him to slow down and take it easy (not something that comes easily to MacGyver; he's very driven).  And Flintstone is popping out teeth like a baby shark.  Tuesday night he had a hard time going to sleep then woke up again at 1, then again at 2, at which point he stayed WIDE awake – not fussy, but really ready to party – until 4:30, and he slept only fitfully after that.  I finally dozed off, conveniently about 10 seconds after my final alarm went off and woke up a half hour later.  I was almost late for work.  Needless to say, I was a little bit cranky pants at work yesterday.

But last night, Flintstone was back to sleeping like a champ.  He slept the whole time I was getting ready for work this morning, too, which is always a blessing, and MacGyver seemed to be feeling pretty good.  He was certainly looking pretty good . . . 

Sorry.  Distracted.

Anyway . . .   When I had to write the date on the forms for dropping Flintstone off, I commented to his super awesome care provider that today is our Miniversary (basically, our dating anniversary) and I hadn't even realized it.  I mean, I have his gift and card waiting in my office, but I didn't realize it this morning.  Oh well, MacGyver didn't say anything about it either.

Then I got to work.  And guess what I found in my bag? 

That little sneak!  He is soooo into surprises, and he always beats me in the romance department, no matter how hard I try.  If you can't tell from the pictures, my first surprise of the day was an assortment of 4 different kinds of cheesecake.  And I'm told there's more to come.  I pointed out to him that we decided to go low-key this year and set a $20 spending limit.  He said that because of the migraines (side effect of the health issues lately), he may have forgotten that.  Scoundrel. 

So today is going to be a good day.  I'm very excited about it.  We already had our Miniversary dinner Monday night because Punky had a thing to go to from 5:30 to 9.  We had some delicious Asian fusion food, then went to our favorite coffee house downtown for dessert, and took a long walk by the waterfront.  I may miss winter, but there are some pluses to living in the South.  The weather was beautiful and downtown here is so pretty.

We'll see what the rest of today has in store, because even in the midst of all the craziness that can present itself in our lives, he is always a bright spot.

I feel the need to recognize just how lucky I am to have MacGyver in my life.  I've commented a million times about what an amazing father he is; how compassionate, loving, witty, and HOT he is.  But there's more to it than that.  It's not just all his amazing qualities, but also how those qualities affect me.

Being with MacGyver makes me a better person and makes our lives better in general.    He is one of the most considerate men you'll ever meet.  He truly pays attention to what I like and how I feel about things.  Sometimes I wonder if he knows me better than I know myself.  He always seems to know exactly what I need – even when what I need isn't pretty.

Because MacGyver is an extremely blunt and honest individual.  To put it plainly, I think it takes a very strong woman to be with MacGyver (I know that sounds braggy, but follow me on this).  MacGyver will never hesitate to tell me when I'm full of crap or to pull me back down to the details when I'm too focused on the big picture.  If you're looking for someone to constantly stroke your ego or who will just play along and do things your way, MacGyver is not your guy.  He has a low tolerance for BS and zero tolerance for narcissism.  He will weigh in whether you ask for his opinion or not.

And I freaking love it.  I find it really comforting to know that I have that check there.  Where other people will tell you what you want to hear while in the back of their minds thinking you're making a fool of yourself or wishing you would change what you're doing, MacGyver will come out and say it.  So I never have to worry that he's not saying what he means, or that I'm doing something dumb without realizing it.  Because I can be a bit flighty.  And I can shockingly be quite a little full of it from time to time.  And I hate feeling like people are just nodding along when I talk.  MacGyver listens, and if I get too lawyery, he calls me on it.

And you know what else?  It makes every compliment, every sweet sentiment a million times more meaningful.  I have always hated dating guys who spew flattery and platitudes.  Even now, if a guy flirts with me and starts blurting out boilerplate compliments, I immediately hop inside my head for a scathing monologue.  I mean, it really is rather insulting.  How shallow do you think I am that you feel the need to suck up to me?  You could at least stop to think for ten seconds before you start blabbering that superficial crap.

But with MacGyver, it's different.  Because his praise is real.  Since I know that he'll tell me if he doesn't like something I'm wearing or if he thinks I'm talking out my a$$, I also know that when he says all the wonderful things he says, he really means them.  This praise is detailed, perfectly fit to me, and honest.  And he's not stingy with the compliments, either.  It seems like every time we talk, I come away feeling more.  I can't really describe it.

If MacGyver doesn't like you, you'll know it in ten seconds flat.  He can pick out your flaws and nail you with them with grave accuracy.  Shallow people don't get along with MacGvyer.  I have at least two friends (not super close, but still friends) who don't like him because he doesn't put up with their BS and he doesn't stroke their egos (or nod along when they are publicly stroking their own).  This trait can make him pretty freaking obnoxious in arguments, and, man, have we had some great ones.  They are extremely few and far between, but damn.  It sucks to argue with someone that blunt who can nail all your flaws.  But it's also amazing.  Because every confrontation is a giant step forward for each of us.  Because nothing simmers in the background, unresolved and ignored.

It is so much better than anything I've had in the past – spineless wimps who just let me have my way (though I did have some very evil fun with those types in my younger years) and the fun, flirtatious, playboys no deeper than a sidewalk puddle.  Ultimately, in my past, I trampled every single guy I dated.  Even Evil Ex before he lost his mind.  But I can't trample MacGyver, and it's the best thing that could have happened to me.

For some people, in some relationships, a dominant personality and a submissive personality fit together perfectly.  But not for me.  I am strong willed and opinionated and can bulldoze over submissive personality types without even realizing it.  I'm so glad to have found someone strong enough to stand up to me, keep up with me, challenge me, and still be there for me when I fall apart.  Which is the real beauty of it.  No one is strong all the time.  And if you're the only strong one in a relationship, who supports you when your strength runs out?  BUT that is a whole other tangent.

MacGyver makes me a better person.  It's not always easy, but it is always, always worth it.

I'm not trying to brag going on about how strong willed MacGyver and I both are.  It's merely a personality type, which, like any other, has its positives and negatives.  In this context, I don't mean strong to be a qualitative measure.  And if you're reading this as some sort of braggy post, you're missing the point.