Coloration

       Happy Halloween All!  I hope you're all having as wonderful a holiday as I am so far.  Last night was our Samhain ritual at church, and it was a huge success - a very satisfying way to recognize lost loved ones and emerse ourselves in the feeling as the veil between the worlds reaches its thinnest point.

      This post isn't actually about Halloween, though. You'll get the real Halloween post when there are pictures uploaded to go with it.

      This post is about my hair. Tres interesant, no?  Like most women, I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about my hair: Up or down? Straight or curled? Long or short? 

       On a day to day basis, I don't have a lot of options. The Marine Corps is pretty stringent on acceptable hairstyles.  I have three go-to uniform hairstyles: french twist, big bun, and cinnamon bun.

       Outside of work, I like to get a little more creative with my hair while still going for a more natural look.  Lately, I've gotten pretty good at the messier styles, and MacGyver loves me in headbands or pigtails. . .

      Today, though my hair is definitely different. Not the style, though. Today, I'm trying out a new color.  For my Poison Ivy costume, I'm dying my hair very red.  Naturally, it's a reddish brown.

      Growing up, my hair was blonde. I remember my chagrin in high school (or late jr high?) When I realized it was turning brown.  Then I was really upset when it started turning red.  Erg. The last thing I wanted was for my hair to turn into Boo's!

      So all through high school, I lightened my hair to the blonde it had always been.  My hair was supposed to be blonde. It just was. To this day, I have a couple friends and family members that insist my hair should be blonde even though my natural shade is clearly no longer blonde.

      I've been thinking though, with this jump to red that maybe afterward I'll lighten it back up a little. Maybe to some heavy highlights again, just to see if I can still pull off blonde.  I definitely had a couple of styles that worked better in blonde.

      What do you think?

      Also, there are new recipes up on the recipes page.

Business and the Breast

This is a first draft. I expect to be editing it in the near future
      The other night, I gave a presentation to the Board of Directors for our church.  It was a very important meeting regarding the future status of our organization. I saw it as a professional presentation and was treated with respect and deference throughout. 

      I also breastfed throughout.

      There was a time when I probably would've seen breastfeeding and professional situations as mutually exclusive. Now, I see no reason for such a crowbar separation of my statuses as a mother and a professional.
If I'm perfectly capable of giving a speech or presentation with a baby in a carrier or even breastfeeding, why shouldn't I?

      The typical answer for that is because it might make OTHER people uncomfortable. And you know what? Bite me. If breastfeeding makes you uncomfortable, that's YOUR problem, not mine. The fact that our culture's views on breastfeeding are skewed and completely screwed up is a well documented one. And the only way to overcome this weird and unnatural "problem" our culture has with breastfeeding is to get out there and DO it.

      So I do. Sure, there may have been members of the board who were uncomfortable with Flintstone breastfeeding while I spoke, but if they were, they didn't say anything. They recognized that breastfeeding is natural and normal and that any discomfort on their part was something for them to overcome. They recognized that Flintstone breastfeeding did not have any impact on the content of my presentation at all.

      At work, I pump twice a day, and everyone knows what my infamous cow sign means. I've never had a real problem with pumping at work. I have breastfed at work, but not "openly," mostly because the uniform makes it more difficult to do discreetly and rank issues make things a little more complicated. I HAVE breastfed at military functions in civilian attire.

      BUT (of course there's a but) it's not always easy. There are plenty of obstacles and frustrations, both internal and external. There are silly little things like when the Lieutenant below me told the Major above me (who wasn't my biggest fan at the time - probably because I make a point of being open about such "female" things as breastfeeding and mothering) that I couldn't process a certain doc right away because, "Capt T is currently lactating."

      There are slightly bigger things that really piss me off. Today, for example.

      Whenever I know I'll be spending most of a day anywhere, I call ahead to make pumping arrangements. My TAD trip to the JAG school was no different. And after I made the call, I didn't think there'd be any issue. The LTCOL I spoke to was immediately understanding and said he'd put me in touch with a female who would set me up with a room and whatnot. Great.

      I found that woman immediately Monday morning, and she showed me the office I could use. Then she spent 10 minutes explaining how to lock the door to me over, and over, and over again.

      I could see it: that twitch at the corner of her fake smile. She was not ok with even the mere IDEA of me pumping breastmilk. But she didn't say anything. Then. Later, after I had pumped, I put the two bags of milk - double-zip, reinforced breastmilk storage bags, into my little bottle cooler and walked past this woman to put the milk into the office fridge.

      She sputtered. She looked chagrined. She clearly wanted to find a way to stop me from putting the milk in the fridge (it's milk; where the eff else would I put it?!). "That has to be in a sealed container." I explained to her that it was, and put the milk in the fridge. Note: When I called ahead, I had made clear my need to use a fridge.

      Oh, and access to a fridge for breast milk is FEDERALLY MANDATED. Ahem.

      The rest of the week, I walked back and forth in front of her icy smile to pump every day. I tried to be super pleasant. She remained fake and icy. Whatever. Then, today, after 4 days(!), when I got to put my little cooler in the fridge, she tells me "someone" complained, and I have to seal the cooler before putting it in the fridge because "no one wants to see that."

      ARE YOU MOTHER EFFING KIDDING ME?!?

      I don't seal the cooler because that defeats the purpose of putting it in the fridge. And, ohbytheway, you can't see the milk inside the little cooler unless you look down inside it. AND there is no reason why anyone else would even KNOW it's breastmilk.

      It's not like this is some super strict fridge. There is plenty of food not in sealed containers. There is tons of stuff in clear containers - INCLUDING COW MILK!!! But MY milk is this big scary deal.

      "No one wants to see that." Seriously? This is a school for military attorneys. We are routinely exposed to all manner of blood and gore, not to mention the details of heinous crimes and even photos and videos of such. But they can't even handle SEEING breastmilk? Please.

      Those people need serious psychological help. I'm not kidding. So I'm pissed. And when the course is over, you can be damned sure I'll be filing a complaint.

      But I'm also a little glad this woman is such a screwed up imbicile. Because now I'm too busy being angry to bother with the tiny nagging guilt that still plagues me.

      The guilt that says I'm inconveniencing people. The guilt that says that since for two 15 minute periods a day I have my office door closed and no one can come it that I'm slacking at work. The guilt about making people feel uncomfortable - even though I know full well it is unreasonable for them to feel that way! And then more guilt for going back on what I know is right by allowing this guilt in. It's a vicious cycle. Welcome to being female in the US.

      No woman should have to feel guilty about combining her desire to do the best she can for her children with her desire to make a difference as a working professional. I CAN do both, and have for over a year. I SHOULD be able to do more. I don't see any reason why, if I CAN competently perform my job, public or not, while wearing and breastfeeding my baby, I shouldn't do that.

      I see in my dreams a brave new world where there are babies on the breast at board meetings and professors leading lectures with babies on their backs. So long as the job is still getting done well, everyone else can deal with it and accept the fact that mothering is a natural part of life, not a handicap.

      I am a skilled professional, and I am a breastfeeding mother. I am both. At the same time.

Screw Spring Cleaning. . .

      . . . I'm more a Fall re-vamp sorta girl.  For weeks now I've been all over our house trying to instill a little organization and style here and there.  We're talking nesting level obsession with organizing and prettifying.

      I love our house.  It is beautiful and bright and has a brilliant open floor plan.

      And I hate our house.  It has this freaking open floor plan that means there is zero storage space and if there is one disorganized space in any room, you can see it from the whole damn house.  *ahem*

      We won't even touch on the fact that I can't JUST clean the floor in the dining room because it's the same floor as the entryway, livingroom, and sunroom so I have to do them all at once every freaking time.

       But it's just a rental.  So, lesson learned, in a couple years when we go elsewhere, we'll be sure to get a place with more storage and separate rooms for everything.  Because that's just my style.

      In the meantime, I'm on a mission.  I am building and creating and moving, reorganizing and stashing.  On a budget, because we STILL haven't settled with the freaking insurance company on the VA house.

      I have been all over Pinterest (have you added me on Pinterest yet? I have a button right over there on the right ---->), finding all sorts of inspiration and ideas.

      My next two big projects are the entryway chaos and Flintstone's room.  I may post pictures when I'm done. But we all know how great I am about remembering to upload pictures.

WWTK Wednesdays: Shopping

I'm finally back on the WWTK Wednesdays train! Mostly because I saw the topic and thought, "Crud, I have a whole lot of that to do over the next couple months." Though, surprisingly, there are no questions about shopping for the upcoming winter holidays (and birthdays in my world). This week's theme is SHOPPING! Here are your questions... 1. Do you shop til you drop, or are you in and out as soon as possible? 2. Are you a price conscious shopper? 3. What store could you spend HOURS in? 4. What is the most frivolous purchase you've ever made? 5. What was the last thing you bought for yourself? 1 Do you shop til you drop, or are you in and out as soon as possible? - This depends on a million factors. I used to get instant headaches just walking into the grocery store. These days, I like grocery shopping. I think meal plans help. And I love fun shopping. But in either case, if the store is to crowded (and I have a low threshold for what counts as too crowded), I'm out. 2. Are you a price conscious shopper? - Yes, yes, and yes. I grew up poor. I struggled to make ends meet in college. I sold blood twice a week. I lived in my car. I look at prices for EVERYTHING and have been known to go back and forth ad nauseum over 50 cents. That said, I make a comfortable living now, and I will spend the money where necessary. This applies mostly to food: local, organic, humane. Humanely raised local meat is expensive. Then again, when you eat meat once a week or less, the increased costs even out. But clothes and shoes and "me" things? Thrift stores and discount all the way. Oh, and the AWESOME store at www.theanimalrescuesite.com Rainforest tab - amazing and helps charities. Go. Now. 3. What store could you spend HOURS in? - So many! World Market, Pier 1, Target (even though I know it's bad, I can't give it up yet, I love it too much), Le Chateau, Rue 21, ANY BOOKSTORE, and, of course, the Rainforest Store on http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com, just in case you forgot to click over the first time even though I asked so nicely. 4. What is the most frivolous purchase you've ever made? - Another air compressor. Oh, wait. . . That wasn't me. ;-) 5. What was the last thing you bought for yourself? - I'm guessing we're not talking about the soy chai tea latte yesterday. Honestly, it is very rare for me to buy things for myself. I got a new eyeliner for Halloween. I DID get a really cute top from - you'll be so shocked - the Rainforest store at The Animal Rescue Site - http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com. NOW, after you've left me a wonderful comment, Go To The Site. Pretty please. You won't be disappointed. Promise.

Can't Get Enough

      I may actually be able to get a real post up today, but in the meantime, there are new posts up on both the  Ethical Eating and Recipes pages.

TAD

A little military  jargon lesson for my civilian readers: T.A.D. = temporary additional duty. Doesn't sound good, but it's really not a bad deal. Effectively, in most cases at least, its basically time off your regular job to go do something else. In my case, this usually means training. Legal training. And, if you're a dork like me and love school as much as I do (not to mention getting paid to go to new places), TAD for legal training is a happy thing.

       . . . And, despite the Marine Corps' penchant for trying to turn acronyms into words, TAD is pronounced T-A-D, not Tad like a country club tennis pro.

This week, I'm at the Army JAG school getting schooled up for my new position as Legal Assistance OIC.  Just half way through the first day, I'm already picking up tons of useful and exciting information. 

I can't exaggerate my excitement over all the information and tools I'm accumulating. If I can make it work, I can use this information to really, really help people. I'm hatching plans. The proverbial wheels are spinning away. Big things are afoot.

I'd be happy enough with just the classes and information, but this TAD is even better because after my days full of learning potential, I get to head out for mini-vacation evenings. Things worked out sarendipitously enough that MacGyver could take time off and the whole fam came with me (originally, it would have just been Flintstone and me).

Did I mention this course is taking place on UVA's campus? In a historic VA city?  Full of fun stuff to do? YES!  So in the evenings, we'll be galavanting around town taking advantage of a free(ish) mini-vacation*.

Blogging will likely be minimals, but hey, you're all getting used to that by now ;-)

*The government is only paying MY expenses, we are by no means using federal money for the fam to galavant (though they are staying with me in my hotel room - which I conscientiously booked at less than the gov max).

Title Ideas?

      I will shortly be launching a new blog (yes, another one). The new blog will be my professional law blog - something I'm undertaking with an eye to future employment in the civilian sector. But I'm having a rough time coming up with a title for the new blog.

      It needs to be something somewhat professional without being too dry, and I don't want to restrict it to one area of law or practice, as I'd like to have the option of allowing it to follow me throughout my career.

      So, any ideas? Just throw them out there, even if you don't think they're great because right now, I've got nothing. Any idea will get my wheels turning.

      Other than that, I'm not sure you'll see a real post from me today. I have dozens of things I want to post about, but things are uber busy right now. Punky's birthday party is tonight and I'm going out of town for work Sunday. Somewhere around those events, I have 6 million other important things to do. But I miss you all and may have more time to blog next week from the Army JAG course.

      In the, meantime, let's hear those title ideas!